Collide – “Crash Course”

To pay for his girlfriend’s medical emergency while abroad, a man (Nicholas Hoult) schemes to pull a drug heist for an eccentric gangster (Anthony Hopkins).


“That Nomad Shad” – There is a prophecy, which foretells of a star-studded film that will fail miserably. These are their stories.

Screen Shot 2016-09-01 at 7.20.06 PM

Strap in and prepare for a collision course with this steaming turd. Nicholas Hoult tries to pull a “one-last-job” role in his most confused role to date. This is a man who steals an expensive bunch of expensive cars and some money to get his girlfriend a kidney transplant.

Felicity Jones plays a bored woman waiting to cash her Rogue One cheque. You know it’s bad when the actress doesn’t even care if her character lives or not.

Anthony Hopkins plays Anthony Hopkins because the writers were too lazy to do anything. I’m pretty sure he was making shit up as he went along. The script is thinner than the paper it was printed on.

It does have some fun elements, though. Kingsley channels his inner Trevor Slattery to bring us Geran, who trolls everyone in this poor man’s Fast and Furious ¹ mess of a film. Man’s gotta make paper.


Finally, big ups to the German Hipster Assassins who couldn’t shoot or drive for shit. I loved you guys!





1 – I couldn’t insult Fast and Furious. It would be Oscar bait next to this “thing”.

Let us know what you thought of the movie!

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